Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Atheists in Foxholes and CNNholes

I tuned in to CNN yesterday to find a 2008 presidential campaign in full gear a year early. Before the presidential campaign begins they need to have the nominating campaign for the ruling duopoly (two-party state).
CNNj is a special network made just for Japan. Unfortunately, it was a huge step backwards from what we had before, CNN International, which was up to international broadcast standards. CNNj is a direct feed from the US most of the time, earning it the name CNNjesusland or Jesusland Direct. I'm not sure how it is different but we don't have "Nancy Grace or "Glenn Beck".

Anyway, I turned it on yesterday to find that there was a program called "Faith and Politics" (seriously!) which interrogated the candidates under bright lights about their "faith". What is this supposed to have to do with politics? Isn't it just about exactly the opposite? It was pretty ugly. I heard John Edwards talk about "the lord" so much I don't know if I can stand to hear him anymore. Even if it had been the lord buddha, that would have been too many mentions, enough to constitute an unhealthy obsession and cult of personality. Soledad O'Brien was on but was followed by Paula Zahn, who always shocks me with insensitive questions like "Tell us how it felt to watch your only child swept away by the raging river." The best she could do yesterday was to ask what candidates prayed for.

It was depressing to watch that, but it could be worth it if a candidate gets the "born-ag'in" vote and promptly institutes a godless socialist dictatorship upon taking office.

There was a little comic relief when Dr Jack Kevorkian was on Larry King Live and seemed to promise Larry to secretly tell him techniques for ending his own life off air during the break, in violation of his parole. To the best of my knowledge, Larry didn't take any of his advice and is still on-air.

Meanwhile the Repuglicants who outbid each other last debate for who would torture earlier and more often were today competing for who would be the quickest to nuke Iran. Yes, actually entertaining the use of battlefield nuclear weapons. There are some very sick puppies in that party who were lined up across the stage for this third (?) depublican rebate (NYT transcript). Only Ron Paul made any sense at all. If the US were a one-party state in which the nominee became the supreme leader and commander-in-chief, as they like to call generallisimo el busho these days, it would be necessary to rally behind that one. They also moved further away from that funny "evilution" talk that yall mighta heard tell bout, and reaffirmed that the world is around 6000 years old and that man is a creation of a god, not "the descendants of a primate".

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