Saturday, February 02, 2008

No Pain, No McCain

As the February 5 Super-Tuesday 22-state primary approaches, Republicans appear to have converged upon John McCain as their candidate. America needs a white man who is older, stubborner, and speaks English better than the current decider. At the moment, polls show McCain beating both Clinton and Obama in match-ups. However, the public also says they would prefer a generic Democrat over a generic Republican. That polling contradiction is sure to resolve itself as American familiarize themselves with Mr McCain.

McCain is famous for his temper and weakness at fielding questions from the public. He may be advised to avoid the public, answer only planted question(er)s, or he may improve with better advisers, higher-quality pharmaceuticals, and cranial implants.

Let's look back for a minute at McCain's macaca moment, where he sang, "Bomb Bomb Bomb, Bomb Bomb Iran." Here's the raw footage from two sources. (ask a stupid question…)

Asked if he was embarrassed or proud or his undignified little joke, McCain asserts, "I'm proud!" (of my casual disregard for human life), and urges anyone who was offended to "Lighten up, get a life," (and bomb Iran).

MoveOn responded.

In another campaign event (macaca), when asked about how he could "Beat the Bitch", McCain showed bad judgment, again, choosing to call it an "Excellent question".

For less raw and more processed footage, Robert Greenwald (Brave New Films) seems to be on the case with the site The Real McCain.

A rough attempt at the anti-McCain theme song we are sure to hear more improved versions of in the future is here:

In an appearance on The Daily Show, McCain joked about having an IED for Jon Stewart's desk. When John Mutha gave him a tongue-lashing, he laughed and told Murtha to "Lighten up and get a life."

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