Friday, January 26, 2007

Road to Hell Paved with Black Ice, Hearts Warmed by Heat-Ray Gun

The Pentagon now has a new ray-gun to fire at civilians in order to cause them excruciating pain should they attempt to exercise their democratic rights to assemble. The new tool should also come in handy at Guantanamo Bay, and may eventually find its way into consumer electronic applications like the taser before it, and be used indiscriminately to discipline small children.

In a related story, the military is working hard to develop all-weather artificial black ice to slip up enemies and cause them to fall down laughing so they can be easily shot. Maxwell Smart would be proud of the Polymer Ice Project. There is not enough plastic pollution around now, and this may divert attention away from the ugly depleted uranium situation by providing comic relief.

One really doesn't see a lot of public clamor or demand for either of these technologies. You have to wonder how these were able to leapfrog over the solar/plugin flexfuel hybrid vehicle or a cure for stupidity.

I think it is time for us to go back to the ideals the country was built on, and abolish standing armies and the Pentagon, to the extent that is possible. The President was never intended to be a permanent "Commander-in-Chief" with a huge army at his private disposal. Armies were only to be raised by an act of Congress, and then dissolved. Having an army to throw around has caused a lot of trouble. The Department of Defense is a euphemism for the Ministry of Aggressive Foreign Wars. If it were really "defense", its duties would overlap with the hideously titled "homeland security" ministry. We should strive to abolish the military and its obscene and immoral waste, channelling those resources into more productive enterprises. Defense should take the form it has in Switzerland, an armed and trained populace ready to defend their liberty. Switzerland has not faced invasion, and neither has Costa Rica. As I read the Second Amendment, which was crafted in that pre-standing army era, persons bearing guns were to be the nation's army. That was it. That was to be the militia, and any excursionary force would need to be created temporarily by the Congress. Reviving this spirit, gun owners should automatically be enrolled in the national self-defense forces, and be required to undergo training in the proper use of their weapon and the tactics to be employed in the event of an invasion.

The only American politician I know of who is thinking along the same lines, looking at the big picture, and talking sensibly of eliminating the Department of Defense is Dennis Kucinich.

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