White House. 3AM. A phone is ringing.

It’s 3:01 a.m. and your children are safe and asleep, but there’s a phone ringing in the White House. Something’s happening in the world. When that call gets answered, wouldn't you know it: it's just Monika Lewinsky calling to give the ex-President his weekly phone sex. So sleep tight, my little ones, and chill. Don't stop thinking about tomorrow. It'll soon be here. It'll be better than before. Yesterday's gone. Yesterday's gone.